Affirm: I am determined to see things differently. I am not a victim of the world. The past is over. It can not effect me any longer.

This is a big factor for me, as a child I experienced a lot of abuse and trauma and it has affected me immensely in ways that I can no longer bare.  I’m holding on to resentment towards my parents and to be quite honest I’m sick of feeling this way.

Change is not hard.  Breaking old patterns can be difficult, but when I affirm that I am not a victim of my past I need to mean it, claim it, own it and move the heck on. 

With peace and gratitude. 

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Some nights I wonder what it’s like to live as a shallow puddle because I continuously have a raging ocean ebbing and flowing inside of me

When you love yourself, then you are lovable, then you can receive love, then you are a magnet for what you want. Take care of yourself, that’s the ultimate love 🙂 🙂

~Salkis Re

2015

Dear 2015,

We went through a lot together this year.  You showed me that life is indeed precious after a scary car crash in January.

February you were kind to me and I delved deeper in my spirituality.

After March it all blended together after I watched the decline of my mother and her myriad of illnesses.

I ended one job, and started a new.

I fell in love with myself.

I fell in love with myself and one more time for good measure…

I fell in love with myself.

Life has not been easy, but after experiencing all of what these last eight years has taught me I am ready for this life cycle to come to an anti-climatic close.

I am so grateful for the experiences. I am so grateful for the lessons. I am so grateful for it all, the good and the not so good.

Thank you for reading this blog, it started off as a collaboration and morphed into something I am so proud of.  Will I continue next year?  Not so sure, but I know that a lot of growth has occurred with being so raw and open.

With gratitude, peace and love 

Aaisha 

Unlimited Self Esteem

Chanting to become a Woman of Unlimited Self-esteem

Danny Nagashima

                                 

Chanting to become a woman of unlimited self-esteem – is the best medicine. When Amy chanted that way, everything in her life changed.

You can analyze your situation all you want . . . you have to get to the root of why you don’t believe in the greatness of our own life. You have to grab the ‘doubt of your greatness’ by the root, and yank it out of your life. You must chant to awaken to your greatness. Chant to appreciate and value your own life. The answer is probably simple. But, since we over-analyze our situation, it gets complicated and the solution seems farther away. When Amy followed Danny’s guidance, it was unbelievable what she felt inside. Your mission as a Buddhist is to be happy – not master suffering. We have the negative part of us, and the positive part of us. There’s a part of us that believes we can do it, and then the negative part says, ‘Who are you kidding?’

You have to fight to not give into your negativity. This is not just about your being a writer, a doctor, a secretary, or whatever your profession maybe. It is about you becoming the woman you always wanted to become – a woman who really values your life. This is an amazing opportunity. THE OBSTACLES YOU FACE ARE THE ANSWER TO YOUR PRAYERS. Those feelings of self-doubt, chase those feelings away — ‘I’m just a scam artist, doctor, lawyer, etc., a failure. – Those feelings you have to face and then chase them away. How you feel about yourself — that feeling of self-loathing, of not being good enough, of not answering the phone, because it may be someone you are accountable to professionally – those are feelings you have to face and then chase them away.

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Your talent is not the question. It’s how you feel about yourself. This is karma. You need to value your own life, appreciate your own life . This has nothing to do with someone validating you. Amy said she followed her heart. She followed her Buddhahood and the effect from that, the benefit from that was MASSIVE. You have to follow your heart and truly treasure your life. When you sit in front of the Gohonzon, chant to have the most reverence for your life. The Gohonzon is the embodiment of your enlightened life. Your life deserves that kind of reverence. When Nichiren Daishonin inscribed the Dai-Gohonzon, he was chanting Daimoku already (out of the greatness of his own wisdom he inscribed the Dai-Gohonzon for all humanity) so everyone could relieve their own suffering.

IF YOU CAN CHANT FOR 2-WEEKS TO REALLY BE A WOMAN OF UNLIMITED SELF-ESTEEM, AND TO REALLY TRULY APPRECIATE YOUR LIFE, YOUR FLAWS, YOUR ACCOMPLISHMENTS, YOUR DEFEATS, YOUR LOSSES, YOUR VICTORIES, WHAT YOU HAVE CREATED, APPRECIATE YOUR TALENT – FOR 2 WEEKS—THEN EVERYTHING WILL CHANGE.

FORGET about all the past suffering in your life. That will just make you feel more impotent. Put it away. From now on, really chant about being a woman of unlimited self-esteem. Really appreciate everything from your life. – All the things about you, that make you incredibly unique and wonderful. And, remember that all the negative feelings – the heartaches—you will be able to use to inspire and help others. This is the suffering you need to share your experience and help others change. Focus on really, awakening your greatness. This is the opportunity you needed to go through, so that you can become outrageously successful. So you can fulfill your dreams. If you focus on this – really valuing your life now, then everything will fall into place. And, in a much bigger way—self worth and self-respect will emerge . And it is something no one can give you. The universe is showing you what you need to tackle.

When you first chant this way, a lot of negativity may come out of your life. Awful feelings may surface. Let it pass through you, like the flu. Transform the darkness. See the enlightened side of your fear. We always bring into our lives what matches our life condition, so don’t fear it. Chant to feel incredible joy about your worth. When you get yourself to a place where you can absolutely see the miracle of your own life, the greatness of your own life, everything in your life will completely transform. We have to believe in our own Buddha nature. When we face the Gohonzon, we should say, ‘I am going to praise my own wonderful life.’

It is important to awaken to our own greatness. Now is the time for you to start over. Your life is the Gohonzon! When you pray to a deity, your prayers are passive. Our lives are the Mystic Law. You must appreciate and value your own life. The Gohonzon is not outside of you. When you receive a benefit, it was you who created it. This is active prayer. You must awaken to your greatness. Believe in the greatness, in the magnificence of your own life. The Gohonzon is the manifestation of Nichiren Daishonin’s enlightenment. Just as a beautiful piece of art elicits a response, or a great book touches your life in a certain way, we must elicit the Buddha nature from our own lives. It is right there. The Gohonzon is the perfect vehicle to bring out our greatest potential.

So, when you display your Buddhahood, bring out that strength, joy, that vibrant life condition, then you take that to the world and change the environment. We’re not necessarily chanting for the house, the car, and the relationship . . . but we are chanting to elevate our life condition to attract that happiness . The results we see in our own lives are a reflection of our life condition. Every day, chant to manifest your Buddha nature consistently. Chant to rise above your basic tendency (I think mine is anger).

Chant with the expectation ‘I WILL MANIFEST MY BUDDHAHOOD!’ And that’s what will arise. I create my own fortune. I am a Buddha, and I will manifest it everyday. I have to believe I deserve boundless happiness. The Buddha is who I really am. Every day I must manifest my Buddhahood and rise above the belief that I am a mere common mortal who does not deserve fortune in her life. Don’t negate your life when you are in front of the Gohonzon. Don’t beg, scream and don’t berate the Gohonzon or your own life. The Gohonzon is the tool we need to bring out our Buddhahood. My life is the Gohonzon . Don’t slander your life. I will fulfill every one of my dreams, for ME. We already possess something incredible – our Buddha nature, the Gohonzon. But sometimes we don’t believe it.

But, we have everything we need to get us out of poverty, to transform our lives. But if I don’t believe that the billion dollars (figure of speech for GREAT benefit) is mine, I won’t be able to enjoy it. It is time to CASH THE CHEQUE. TRUST THAT THE GOHONZON IS THE ABSOLUTE MEANS FOR YOU TO TRANSFORM YOUR LIFE. TRUST IS THE KEY WORD. CHANT WITH THE EXPECTATION THAT EVERY ONE OF YOUR WILDEST DREAMS WILL BE FULFILLED BEYOND YOUR WILDEST IMAGINATION. CHANT TO BELIEVE IN YOUR BUDDHAHOOD. TRUST IN THE GREATNESS OF YOUR LIFE.

In ‘On Attaining Buddhahood’ Nichiren Daishonin makes the primary point – to free ourselves from the sufferings of birth and death we have endured in lifetime after lifetime and to attain absolute happiness we must awaken to the mystic truth that has always been within our lives – that truth is Nam-Myoho-Renge- Kyo. That truth is that I am a BUDDHA.

Amy got guidance to chant for the right man to come into her life for her happiness. It seemed too easy, she said. She questioned the guidance ”what if he is a midget? What if he is poor?” But that day she met her husband. Trust the power of your Daimoku. Your life will be HUGE! Put your life first. Trust that ”billion-dollar check”(you are afraid to cash) does exist. Trust that you have EVERYTHING you need for your happiness – it is in the Gohonzon – it is in your life!

When you look at the Gohonzon know that you have exactly what you need to fulfill every prayer and become wildly, extraordinary happy!

Positive Discussion Points on Becoming Women of Unlimited Self Esteem

Ø Believe we can do it
Ø Fight to not give into negativity
Ø Become the woman you want to be
Ø Value your life
Ø Appreciate your life including your flaws
Ø Treasure your life
Ø Have reverence for your life
Ø Forget about the past sufferings in your life
Ø Believe that you are incredibly unique and wonderful
Ø Become outrageously successful at fulfilling your dreams
Ø Praise your own wonderful life
Ø Create your own benefit in your life
Ø Bring out our strength, joy and vibrant-life condition
Ø Believe in your own Buddha nature
Ø Realize that your life is the Gohonzon
Ø Manifest your extraordinary side
Ø Fulfill all of your dreams
Ø You have everything you need to transform your life

Negative discussion points on becoming Women of Unlimited self-esteem

Ø Not believing in our greatness
Ø Who are we kidding – we can’t do it
Ø Feelings of self doubt
Ø Believing we are not good enough
Ø Self loathing
Ø Needing the validation of others
Ø I am a mere mortal who does not deserve fortune in my life
Ø Begging to, screaming to, or berating the Gohonzon/our own life
Ø I can’t do it
Ø Holding on to past sufferings in our lives

Prayers to Enhance Becoming Women of Unlimited Self Esteem
Ø Chant to awaken to my greatness, my magnificence
Ø Chant to appreciate the value of my life
Ø Chant to be happy
Ø Chant to appreciate my talent
Ø Chant to feel incredible joy about my worth
Ø Chant to manifest my Buddha nature consistently
Ø Chant to rise about my basic negative tendency
Ø Chant to forget about the past garbage in my life
Ø Believe in my own Buddha nature
Ø Realize that my life is the Gohonzon
Ø Trust that the Gohonzon is the means to transform my life

Chant to become a woman of unlimited self-esteem

Every time you decide to put Love first it affects the energy of everyone and everything in your stratosphere. Hold a vision of Love with one-pointed concentration, and all that you’ve feared and resisted will change before you.

What I won’t be doing starting yesterday. 

Is extending myself, checking on people, making sure you’re alright when you’re perfectly content on not reciprocating the same sentiment or even returning my call. I’m a strong individual, sensitive but strong and no I’m not in mood etc. it’s just exhausting maintianing one-sided relationships and friendships. No on is exempt, family, friends, fish, cats I think you get the picture. 

I need all my energy to cultivate healthy, loving reciprocal relationships.  

 

Thank you for setting me free. 

Today marks two years since my divorce to Liam was finalized and we did our celebratory phone call to each other this morning and I thanked him for the lesson. I reflect on that day because it was joyful and sad at the same time. We loved each other so deeply and for that to end was devastating for us both.